You're laughing

... while I'm nodding. Unless the video gets pulled down. In which case, you're cursing, while I'm laughing.

I'm a born lever puller, me

I was just missing London, sort of, where I've been once for pleasure, and for something like seven weeks for business. But I wasn't missing the Eye or Veeraswamy or the chicken wings at the Japanese place near the Sanderson or even walking through St. James Park on my way to the office from one hotel, or how I'd always try to pick a different route to and from the Sanderson from and to the office. I can remember fondly the feeling I got when someone would ask me directions, and I could help them, but I'm not missing that, or even the feeling of heading in from Heathrow (although with all the traffic on the A4, it wasn't anticipation that was the prominent feeling there).

I'm remembering the ride back to Heathrow. More specifically, I'm remembering the moment the car came up on Harrods. I'd gone with the missus on my first visit there, and it was the last landmark I'd recognize on my way out of town, and the last part of town I'd know I was in. Harrods is in Knightsbrige, and then what? Well, Kensington, but I'd never been in much of it, and not on Brompton Road, which is what the car was taking out of the city. Passing Harrods was goodbye to London, and some kind of forlornness related to whether I'd ever return, even when I knew I'd be back three days later. Maybe on those occasions, it had to do with a return to routine back home. Maybe I was thinking of Veeraswamy, subconsciously, but it was more feeling than thinking.

The feeling is of a piece with my feelings about Amsterdam. I've been there three times -- the last two alone, the first with a "friend" with whom I got along so famously, I opted to spend the last half of our week there alone. Amsterdam was my first trip outside North America, and still kind of envelops my prototype feelings about Europe. And when I decided to treat myself to nine days of vacation, by myself, I decided to spend a couple of days in Paris, and 24 hours in Brussels, having never been in either city -- and five days in Amsterdam. Again. And I was lonely there, and I enjoyed it very much. Maybe most, I like going to the Dam, the big open square in front of the Royal Palace, hard by the Nieuwe Kerk. I always go in winter, and I like to go to Dam Square at night. Short of maybe captivity, I think there must be no easier place to feel alone.

This is all somehow related to how I felt when I started The Suffering Channel, the last story in Oblivion, the last book of DFW's that I had yet to read, and realized I would never begin another DFW book or story in a DFW book again, but I'm not a deep enough thinker to put my finger on how.

Anyway, I wish I were in London. I'd like to get about three orders of those wings.

DFW kills me

I'm reading Oblivion, his last collection of short stories, for the first time. Which means you should be jealous, whether you've already read it or not. Just the beginning of Good Old Neon:

My whole life I've been a fraud. I'm not exaggerating. Pretty much all I've ever done all the time is try to create a certain impression of me in other people. Mostly to be liked or admired. It's a little more complicated than that, maybe. But when you come right down to it it's to be liked, loved. Admired, approved of, applauded, whatever. You get the idea. I did well in school, but deep down the whole thing's motive wasn't to learn or improve myself but just to do well, to get good grades and make sports teams and perform well. To have a good transcript or varsity letters to show people. I didn't enjoy it much because I was always scared I wouldn't do well enough. The fear made me work really hard, so I'd always do well and end up getting what I wanted. But then, once I got the best grade or made All City or got Angela Mead to let me put my hand on her breast, I wouldn't feel much of anything except maybe fear that I wouldn't be able to get it again. The next time or next thing I wanted. I remember being down in the rec room in Angela Mead's basement on the couch and having her let me get my hand up under her blouse and not even really feeling the soft aliveness or whatever of her breast because all I was doing was thinking, 'Now I'm the guy that Mead let get to second with her.' Later that seemed so sad. This was in middle school. She was a very big-hearted, quiet, self-contained, thoughtful girl -- she's a veterinarian now, with her own practice -- and I never even really saw her, I couldn't see anything except who I might be in her eyes, this cheerleader and probably number two or three among the most desirable girls in middle school that year. She was much more than that, she was beyond all that adolescent ranking and popularity crap, but I never really let her be or saw her as more, although I put up a very good front as somebody who could have deep conversations and really wanted to know and understand who she was inside.

Just the tip of the iceberg, of course; then of course he goes off in fourteen different dimensions in ways I never could. If you've never read him, add my voice to those of the masses: Go to the Howling Fantods site and read one of the essays or short stories they link to over there and get started.

Next up: finding WMDs in Iraq. Again.

Think Progress said this better than I will, but I wanted to get a record of it here. Rick Santorum, having capped a brilliant career in gay studies with his work showing that homosexuality and bestiality are the same in the eyes of God, has moved on to the comparatively light subject of Islam. After claiming that Americans know too little about the faith:

The Quran is perfect just the way it is, that’s why it is only written in Islamic.

Trust me: In context, it's even weirder. Plus, you wouldn't understand it anyway, unless you speak Jew.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: the final analysis

The top 12 Beatles songs (subjectively) break down like this:

Magical Mystery Tour: 3 songs
Revolver: 3 songs
Sgt. Pepper: 1 songs
For Sale: 1 song
Past Masters vol. II: 1 song
Abbey Road: 1 song
Rubber Soul: 1 song
The Beatles: 1 song

Obviously, there are issues with the stats; Hey Jude was a single, and so were some of the songs that also were on albums, most notably the songs on Magical Mystery Tour. But we have to work with the data we have.

Let's expand it to the top 25:

Revolver: 5
Abbey Road: 4
The Beatles: 4
Magical Mystery Tour: 3
For Sale: 3
Sgt. Pepper: 2
Past Masters vol. II: 2
Rubber Soul: 1
Help!: 1

Wouldn't have thought Abbey Road would be that well represented. I knew the heavy For Sale representation was coming, but I'm surprised there isn't more from Rubber Soul and Help! Probably worth doing a top 40:

Revolver: 6
Abbey Road: 6
The Beatles: 5
For Sale: 4
Sgt. Pepper: 4
Help!: 4
Magical Mystery Tour: 3
Let It Be: 2
Past Masters vol. II: 2
Rubber Soul: 1
With the Beatles: 1
Yellow Submarine: 1
A Hard Day's Night: 1

Definitely worth noting that there are four more Rubber Soul songs from 41 through 50, which explains a lot. I'm still surprised by Abbey Road, and happy that they went out on top. Help! is more where I expected it, too. But I didn't know Abbey Road would be right there with Revolver. Revolver, I probably knew.

Know what? Let's do down to the point just before where I stop loving songs. That's the top 100, conveniently enough:

White Album: 16
Abbey Road: 12
Sgt. Pepper: 9
Revolver: 8
Past Masters vol. II: 7
Rubber Soul: 7
Magical Mystery Tour: 7
Past Masters vol. I: 6
For Sale: 6
Help!: 5
With the Beatles: 5
Let It Be: 4
A Hard Day's Night: 3
Yellow Submarine: 3
Please Please Me: 2

Thoughts: I bet your list is mostly in that order ... I might have Rubber Soul a little higher than you and Past Masters vol. I, Let It Be, and Please Please Me a little lower ... Most albums flesh out between the top 40 and the top 100 pretty much the same, with the exceptions of the White Album, which explodes; Abbey Road, which continues its dominance; Sgt. Pepper, which I probably rate lower than most (meaning you might have it higher in the top 40, and therefore not growing as much over the next 60 slots); Rubber Soul, which has a real solid great middle; and With the Beatles, which I think I appreciate more than most.

You'll also remember we promised to revisit the songwriter charts. I broke down my bottom half like this:

Paul: 28
John: 26
George: 13
Ringo: 9

Well, here's the top half, unofficial count:

John: 72
Paul: 49
George: 12
Ringo: 0

Not giving Ringo credit for songs John and Paul wrote. I counted these backwards too, and things were pretty even until the end, which means I suspect John dominates the top 25 and 40, if not the top 10. Let's find out:

Top 40
John: 28
Paul: 10
George: 2

Top 25

John: 19
Paul: 4
George: 2

Top 10
John: 7
Paul: 3

But the top 6:

John: 3
Paul: 3

The data speak for themselves.

So that's it, I think. Thanks for exploring this extremely unimportant side of me with me.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: the final countdown

I just want to thank everyone/anyone who's read this far. I've enjoyed it.

12. A Day in the Life (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

I've seen interpretations of the lyrics as portraying mundane daily life, but I'm unconvinced. They're a little incoherent and meaningless. Just saying why this song isn't in the top 10, which surprised even me. Everything else about it, of course, is perfect, and its groundbreakingnesshoodosity cannot be overstated. One of the most perfectly arranged songs ever.

11. Dear Prudence (The Beatles)

The arrangement is spare in parts, and that makes me want to dock it, but it sets up the end so nicely, especially the fullness the piano adds, I'm going to credit them for doing it intentionally. One of the biggest influences on me as an arranger; it just builds so inspiredly.

10. No Reply (For Sale)

Ah, the top 10. No guilt anymore, right? Wrong. This song is so amazing, I *still* feel guilty. The music creates a tone here like they rarely were able to again -- a precursor to Ticket to Ride, in that way. But I think this song is a little more interesting. Not to mention that it took the spurned lover lyrical bit into new (stalker-y) territory.

9. I Am the Walrus (Magical Mystery Tour)

I again am guilty of valuing historical significance over subjective likingness. Although I surely loved this song the first 100,000 times I listened to it. But I love No Reply even now in the second 100,000. The most experimental of their real songs, no?

8. All You Need Is Love (Magical Mystery Tour)

I've read where John used this melody -- often referred to as the "Three Blind Mice" melody -- repeatedly; we're talking about the "Love, love, love" melody (and progression) here. I don't see it, unless people mean all songs with that descending, Dear Prudence-y progression. I want to give this bonus points for John and the band's coming up with it on such short notice, so it could be broadcast as part of a global special, but they did that all the time, didn't they?

7. Nowhere Man (Rubber Soul)

Just enough points for historical impact to keep it above All You Need Is Love, which is saying something. It's maybe the song I think of first when I think of that era of having instruments panned one way and voices the other. In some ways, John's most candid piece of writing, with the possible exception of his contribution in the top two. And the beautiful backing vocals, and the guitar sound so shiny ...

6. Got to Get You Into My Life (Revolver)

The first appearance of those horns, right? Paul's second-best melody of his career, and a vocal performance to match it. That descending progression again in the "Ooh" part. A tastefully timed appearance by that electric guitar. And the wonderful, wonderful fadeout. It was very hard to rate this below the song above it, maybe the most difficult call of this project.

5. Tomorrow Never Knows (Revolver)

Because the top five, I mean, that has cachet, no? Anyway, this might have made top five even if it were a capella. Then again, so should A Day in the Life, right? But what a wonderful vocal, for which we are also crediting George Martin, especially for the stunning second verse. The instrumental 'break' is so perfectly constructed out of so many different parts that could have been arranged differently (by which I mean less effectively). And that awesome vocal fadeout, which makes it every bit the match of Got to Get You Into My Life.

4. You Never Give Me Your Money (Abbey Road)

By far, the biggest surprise of this project for me is this song's not being number three. I mean, before I sat here and thought about it, I wouldn't even have thought about it, you know? This is kind of Paul's analog to Happiness Is a Warm Gun, but more coherent. And it's got those guitar arpeggios. Not the ones at the end that get reprised at the end of the record, though those are awesome too. I'm talking about the ones that sound like chimes, after "Oh, that magic feeling, nowhere to go." I think it might be my single favorite Beatle 'part.' It seems like I should have a lot more to say about this song; I love it very much. My one reservation is that I don't think it was produced as well as it could have been. Either I disagree with some of the guitar and keyboard sounds they chose, or they could have been mixed better. I don't think they would disagree with me; there are lots of tics and screw-ups, tons on Sgt. Pepper's alone.

3. She Said, She Said (Revolver)

I'm as surprised as you are. Do other people have this in their top three? It's just really really well produced; the tone and sound are consistent. I love the sound, which has a lot to do with the bassline in the verse and the ... is that a tamboura? Nice feel by Ringo on the "And she's making me feel like I've never been born" parts. The progression for the bridge is just inspired, and I still have trouble figuring out the tempo changes. And then there's the fadeout.

2. Strawberry Fields Forever (Magical Mystery Tour)

It must be my love for John's work that made me try so hard to land this in the top spot. I also think it's a better song than the top song, from a songwriting standpoint. And, of course, I love it, so that's a tough combination to best. I think Norwegian Wood ends up winning for best-conceived lyrics, but the message here, which I read as against closedmindedness, and against thinking you're right all the time, or that there even is a definitive conception of anything, including reality, is my favorite, a more eloquent further exploration of what John was saying in Rain. I find the top song to be a lyrical complement to this song, too. The progression here is better than the top song's; John worked harder in writing this. The song builds so wonderfully in its arrangement. And then of course all the work that went into mixing the "Beatle" half and the "orchestra" half, maybe George Martin's biggest achievement. And props to John, too, for expecting the impossible in that regard; he got it.

1. Hey Jude (Past Masters vol. II)

Not that this doesn't have a nice progression. Not that there isn't a lot of good stuff going on in the first half of this, from the pacing to the harmonies. And not that these aren't some unique lyrics for Paul. But let's be candid: This song is all about the anthemic second half. Four chords (three, really; the first is repeated as the fourth), over and over. This song formed me as an arranger; I've been trying to recreate it ever since. And we'll never know if this song could have taken the top spot without that words-can't-describe vocal performance by Paul in this half. I mean, everything he did (everything he did that stayed edited in, anyway) worked. He was in the zone. I never counted, but I read that the four chords are repeated 17 times. Maybe that's how many it takes, although I'm bouyant from the very second Paul's scream takes us into the beginning of that coda. As long as it takes to fade out, has anyone ever wanted it to end?

* * *

Discuss: These 12 songs would make a pretty cool album, am I right?

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: snake eyes!

Ah, I got nothing ...

24. Getting Better (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

Awesome from the opening notes, supposedly produced by striking the strings of a piano, and recorded to sound different by George Martin. Musically, the verse stays on one note (G, if I'm not mistaken) and is never boring. And again, awesome use of tamboura. Brutally frank treatment in the lyrics, this marked a new plateau in honesty and candor as they moved ever farther away from the 'bubble gum' lyrics.

23. Savoy Truffle (The Beatles)

Ah, the saxes. My God, the saxes. Cool progression, too. And the organ sound is supercool. But the saxes ...

22. Sexy Sadie (The Beatles)

This didn't have much in the way of dynamics either, did it? I honestly think John either was kind of lazy by now or was too focused on the song and not bothering about songcraft or production. Possibly both. But the song is perfection, from the opening piano notes to the descending/ascending/descending progression. I love the way John sang it, too; an excellent performance.

21. Polythene Pam (Abbey Road)

I honestly almost raised it over Ticket to Ride just because of the way John says “Great!” toward the end. But Ticket to Ride’s beat put it over the top. The guitar sounds (and mixing) in this are beautiful, though. In some ways, this is Abbey Road in microcosm.

20. Ticket to Ride (Help!)

I really can't believe this isn't in my top 10. Did any Beatle song create a mood as effectively as this song did? Ringo talked about his drumming in Rain as if he were temporarily possessed, but this might be his most inspired beat.

19. Baby's in Black (For Sale)

It hurts, people. It hurts not to have this in the top 10. If this were purely about singability -- if iPods could only make playlists 10 songs long, and I wanted one of Beatle songs just for singing, this wouldn't just be on the list, it might be the first song picked for it. The harmonies are plotted out, almost stately; they don't move around too much, but they're so great.

18. Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey (The Beatles)

This kind of could have been ranked almost anywhere; more than a lot of other songs, I really had to keep moving it up and asking "Do I like it more than ..." whatever song I'd temporarily vaulted it above. I don't know that I would have guessed it to be so high at the outset. That would have been fun, actually, guessing at a top 10 or 20, giving myself only two minutes or so to compile it. This song is so in-your-face frenetic, which you can tell because someone keeps screaming in between "Take it easy"s.

17. Mean Mr. Mustard (Abbey Road)

Obviously the medleys create ranking problems. I’m pretending they are full-length songs and giving them credit for what else they might have done in that time, assuming it wouldn’t have been just more of the same, like just a third verse and extra chorus – in other words, I’m dividing awesomeness by time and then extrapolating.

This is my favorite of the three pieces: John's voice is superbad, the tambourine comes in at a nice spot, the Moog sounds great, Paul's harmonies in the second verse are spot-on, and the lyrics are tight, yo.

16. Because (Abbey Road)

I have to fight the urge to penalize this song for having so few parts to it, for some reason. Luckily, the singing and mixing are so genius that even a dink like me is floored. The lyrics are great too, if you don't take them too seriously.

15. Rain (Past Masters vol. II)

No other Beatles song sounds like this one, which isn't true of a lot of others. I love the rhythm guitar sound, and what Paul is doing on bass. I love John's vocal, and the production. And I love the message, maybe more than any other song's.

14. Taxman (Revolver)

Which should just about do it for George. If you don't know, that's Paul playing what as far as I know is his best guitar solo in the band's career. By the way, I wanted to vault each of the last four songs over this, but I just couldn't, because of that iconic bassline. That bassline is as influential as anything.

13. And Your Bird Can Sing (Revolver)

OK, remember how I was saying I shouldn't let alternate versions factor into the countdown too much? Well I'm granting myself an exception. The Anthology take of this, where John and Paul can't do a vocal overdub because they're either too high or tripping, could cheer me up no matter how down I was. As for the album version, it's got the great guitar work, and it's so much fun to try to sing along with John (and Paul, when he shows up). Also, the bridge of this might be the first instance where they used their trademark descending chord progression.

* * *

Join us tomorrow for the wrap-up. I might not surprise you with my favorite, but I'll surprise myself with my third-favorite.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: Bar-Mitzvah

Today I am a fountain pen:

36. Let It Be (Let It Be)

The song so good, they named the album after it. George's solo on this shaped me as a guitarist. The surreal backing vocals boosted this above You've Got to Hide Your Love Away.

35. I've Just Seen a Face (Help!)

Kind of the precursor to All Together Now, in that it's in the argument for most singable Beatles song. Is it annoying when I say "great harmonies"? Are you like, Yeah, I *know* it has great harmonies, it's the friggin' Beatles?

34. I Don't Want to Spoil the Party (For Sale)

How is this only 34 when I love this song so much? The melody, and where it goes for the third line of the verse ... the awesome harmonies in the bridge ... the way they change up the beat in the bridge ... the intro and outro ... if this were the best song the Beatles had ever done, they might still be my favorite band. You know what? No way this is 34.

34. If I Fell (A Hard Day's Night)

So John is actually singing the harmony in this, right? The high part's the melody? This was the Beatles' first beautiful song, isn't it?

33. Eight Days a Week (For Sale)

I can't rank this song objectively. I've got summer camp dance memory issues; I don't remember who I was dancing with, but I remember the song. And then they put the alternate takes on the Anthology disc, the ones with the different intros they tried, and that couldn't have been more fun to listen to. When I think of their early hits, their breakthrough hits, I think of She Loves You, and I Want to Hold Your Hand, but this is my favorite, hands down.

32. Help! (Help!)

Help! Sorry. So I try not to give too too many context points, but I do admire this song (and rate it accordingly) knowing what a breakthrough it was for John lyrically. I think I read that he was sorry later he made it so catchy, that it obscured what he was saying, but that's the beauty of the Beatles' work. Maybe by now he'd have come around on that stuff.

31. Across the Universe (Let It Be)

Helped by some of the recently released alternate takes, especially the one with the tamboura in it. Took me a while to appreciate this song. Maybe I just needed to grow up. Maybe ... maybe we've all got a little growing up to do.

30. Sun King (Abbey Road)

Think I underrated it. Can't explain how much I love the "Everybody's laughing" part. Have you heard the backwards version on the Love CD? I think that part works even better backwards.

29. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

The song so good, they ... saw that one coming, didn't you? I became a bigger fan of this track after hearing the Yellow Submarine version, where the guitars are mixed higher up in the chorus.

28. She Came in Through the Bathroom Window (Abbey Road)

See, why did Paul waste time with those other songs when he could write melodies like this? Props to as many Georges as it took to get that guitar sound in the verse.

27. Hey Bulldog (Yellow Submarine)

This is not a luxury; this is a necessity. I can imagine someone thinking this song is just a lark, but it's so joyous (and such a cool riff), the mix is so great, the solo is so great, and the end ... again, I would have overrated a recording of John and Paul pooping in 1969 as long as it sounded like they were having fun doing it.

26. Please Mister Postman (With the Beatles)

It is to my eternal shame that I did not get this into my top 25. I can't look past the fact that the whole song is the same progression, the same four chords over and over again, with no variation. So it's this high for three reasons: the energy, the opening, and maybe the best vocal performance of John's career.

25. I Don't Want to Spoil the Party (For Sale)

There, that looks better, doesn't it?

* * *

Join us tomorrow for this week's long-distance dedication.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: twelve Beatles Beatling

Not a lot of back-and-forth in the comments lately. Let's try to pick it up, people.

48. Twist and Shout (Please Please Me)

Another heroic performance vocally by John; you've likely heard that they cut this record in one day, and this was the last song recorded, after John's voice was shot. Thank God, huh?

47. You Won't See Me (Rubber Soul)

A favorite of mine, this would be higher if the production and playing weren't so choppy. Fun bassline to play along with.

46. Come Together (Abbey Road)

The hook that opens the song (and recurs) is just brilliant producing. You have to be a real student to know which sounds are in the mix, so well do they mesh together. Paul singing the low harmony in a song always puts a hop in my step too. Would've been higher with a more frenetic guitar solo, but I respect them if that's not what they were going for.

45. I'm Looking Through You (Rubber Soul)

Yeah, see, I think I probably like You Won't See Me better, but this is better mixed, if not better played. Once again, I've been unable to restrain myself for giving extra credit for an alternate take, in this case the Anthology cut that begins like it's going to be Magic Bus.

44. Happiness Is a Warm Gun (The Beatles)

So I've been fighting a nagging feeling for a while now that I'm paying more attention to how 'great' a song is when the original premise was how much I liked each song. I'm reconciling this by stating that I like ALL these songs, a lot. I mean, when you're comparing Happiness Is a Warm Gun with Norwegian Wood, you're going to need *something* to differentiate them. So in this case, let me say that, obviously, I love this song, but it's not entirely coherent. And that I bet by the end of the project, I'll be valuing likability over songcraft again.

43. Drive My Car (Rubber Soul)

Not the most complex song, but lots of fun. The harmony at the end of each verse is excellent and unexpected, and the riff is undeniable. It will have its way.

42. Here Comes the Sun (Abbey Road)

One of George's finest. Probably his best song, in my opinion, and I love the Moog experiment he performed on it.

41. Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown) (Rubber Soul)

In case you were accusing me back around number 46 of not appreciating a tasteful and laid back piece of playing, I think this was maybe George's finest sitar work, despite how much better he surely must have gotten at it in subsequent years. I'm also going to nominate this for best lyrics in a Beatles song right now, just as a hypothesis; we'll see what ends up knocking it off as we move on.

40. Doctor Robert (Revolver)

Sorry, I just like to sing it. Not a big fan of the bridge, but I'll sing that too, just you watch.

39. With a Little Help from My Friends (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

One of the best marriages of Paul's bass playing to a song; he's done better stuff, maybe, but it's unobtrusive here, and really fits in. Some cool theory going into the bridge, the way it hearkens back to the refrain.

38. Cry Baby Cry (The Beatles)

I don't know if I know enough to talk instructively about this song (though why should it be any different?). Lot of interesting things going on, from the arrangement to the piano part to the game you can play wondering how many minutes John spent on the lyrics. You know what song it kind of reminds me of, in a totally-the-opposite kind of way? I'm Only Sleeping. That song's tone and dynamics are constant. This song really builds nicely through its arrangement without relying solely on volume.

37. You've Got to Hide Your Love Away (Help!)

The precursor to Norwegian Wood, this has more feeling, doesn't it? Probably by design. Relatively simple, but no denying it works. You might notice that John is flat on one of his "Hey!"s, but if you've never done so, *you* try hitting them all.

* * *

Still a couple of surprises to come, including a couple of songs that probably aren't in your top 30.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: This one goes to 11

Originality was never big on my list of things to be.

61. All Together Now (Yellow Submarine)

This song isn't catchy, it's infectious. It's contagious. It's communicable. OK, I'm not sure what that means. Plus it's got Paul and John working together, which is always nice. I used to think John was singing "Jump the tree." I'm still not convinced he shouldn't have.

60. You Can't Do That (A Hard Day's Night)

See, I went and said I LOVE Run for Your Life, so now what word am I supposed to use for this song? I love love love this song. The harmony in the bridge -- hell, the melody in the bridge -- is so unexpected. I love the tone of the lyrics too. And the harmonies in the verse.

59. I Saw Her Standing There (Please Please Me)

Awesome opener for the first proper Beatles album. Interesting, too, in that again, John was really the lead singer at that point. And an insecure man. A testament to the song, then, that he made no recorded complaint about letting it lead off. Or did George Martin take that decision out of the band's hands?

58. Every Little Thing (For Sale)

I can't entirely explain why this is so high. It has a lot of what I find appealing in I Don't Want to Spoil the Party, which you might just now be noticing I haven't listed yet. I like the chorus, and when John sings "I will love her forever," well, I get a funny feeling in my tummy.

57. You're Going to Lose That Girl (Help!)

John's vocal vaults this so much higher than it deserves to be. Is there anyone who doesn't love singing this song? Does everyone else sing both the melody and the harmony response, or is that just me?

56. Carry That Weight (Abbey Road)

Yeah, so here we are. The first countdown guy kept this part of the medley together, and probably he was right, but it seemed like the idea was to rank each track. I won't deny that I considered each one in context, but I tried to rank each one individually. The fact that I ended up grouping them so close together likely means I failed. But at least I got to rank each against the other.

In that context, this is the bottom of the three. Of course, how short the song is has something to do with that. Basically, I added points for the anthemic part of the song, but the reprise of You Never Give Me Your Money suffers for being a reprise, although the guitar arpeggios lifted from the same song do not. I ranked it above Get Back, so I don't think I short-changed it, but not as much to recommend it as there is in the other two parts.

55. Golden Slumbers (Abbey Road)

Just a stronger composition overall, even if I like the Carry That Weight line better than any individual part of this track. Why is this soooooo much better than The Long and Winding Road? I can't really figure it out; it doesn't seem so terribly different. I might have to tuck into Alan W. Pollack's study. Great job by Ringo and Paul on the chorus.

54. Revolution (The Beatles)

The rhythm guitar sound they came up with is just awesome. Nice keys, too, of course.

53. A Hard Day's Night (A Hard Day's Night)

They're still trying to figure out that opening chord. Props to John and Paul for the interplay between them as the song transitions from Paul's bridge to John's verse. Just as I am unable to forget hearing some alternate takes and versions of some songs, how can you separate this song from the open of the movie, and the frenetic feeling the whole thing had?

52. Lovely Rita (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

I don't know how much credit I give this song for the sound they got for the opening notes, but it's a lot, for sure. Beautiful sound, and Paul complements it perfectly vocally. I like the chorus a lot too, really the harmonies throughout the song. And the ending.

51. I'm Only Sleeping (Revolver)

I listen to this less and less often these days, but what a great song, what a great bridge, what a cool idea with all the false stops, and how nice a job they did finding a totally different sound for this track. That's a hallmark for this album, isn't it? Maybe even moreso here than on Sgt. Pepper. This, Yellow Submarine, She Said She Said, Got to Get You Into My Life, Tomorrow Never Knows, Taxman ... and that's not to mention all the songs I don't really listen to.

50. The End (Abbey Road)

Great idea, so well executed. It's so much fun to hear them all soloing, with the bonus of George's best lead playing of the band's career, in my opinion. And then the beautiful sentiment at the end, so beautifully done. Paul's "... you make" and George's guitar lick right after ... a lot of the songs, I ranked them where I did for a nice moment, and there really couldn't be a nicer or more fitting moment than that one, from two Beatles who did not get along by that point, to end their release output.

49. Something (Abbey Road)

I might have ranked this lower than The End if The End were a 'full' song. I'm not this song's hugest fan, but I appreciate the excellent melody, and how great that George turned in such a world class bridge, which really is the highlight of the song for me.

* * *

Yup, only 13 songs. With quality like this, we don't have to pad anything. We're really going to mine the middle period on Monday.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: minyan

Get it?

75. I'm So Tired (The Beatles)

I was very surprised I didn't rank this higher. I think one thing this exercise has done is make me see that I really like some songs just because.

74. I Feel Fine (Past Masters vol. I)

What the hell is this doing on this disc? How is it different from Day Tripper and Paperback Writer? I used to really love this song; terrific vocals the whole way through.

73. Paperback Writer (Past Masters vol. II)

Why higher than I Feel Fine? For the production, I guess, the mixing, and the lyrics. I Feel Fine certainly has an argument, and might be more fun to sing.

72. This Boy (Past Masters vol. I)

Christ but he sings the ass off that bridge. He described Yes It Is as a knockoff of this, and I don’t know that that song is inferior to this one, but he definitely puts more energy into the bridge.

71. All I've Got to Do (With the Beatles)

I love the dynamics of this song; the way the verses are so languishy, and the bridge or chorus or whatever it is so energetic. Credit John's vocal and Ringo's drumming, I think.

70. I'm a Loser (For Sale)

I am sure I'm underrating this. Such a great song. If it weren't sandwiched between two even better songs, who knows where I might have put it?

69. Within You Without You (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

Songcraft wins out over singability. I mean, hands down I like I'm a Loser much better than this. And I'm not too crazy about George's vocal here. But you've got to admire what they did in that studio.

68. Baby You're a Rich Man (Magical Mystery Tour)

Discovered it late, and still haven't listened to it too much, which helps. It's good to still have songs like that.

67. Get Back (Let It Be)

A shining jewel on this album. But why is Paul the only one who looks like he's having fun playing it? Even Ringo looks like's he's a session player.

66. Revolution 1 (The Beatles)

I like the production. Might go on just a little too long, but that befits its tempo, maybe. Some people seem to think John's "... out ... in ..." is a copout, but I think it's eloquent.

65. Run for Your Life (Rubber Soul)

LOVE this song. Awesome guitar sound, and nice chorus harmonies. Superfun to sing. Tough to explain the lyrics to a 3-year-old, though.

64. Back in the U.S.S.R. (The Beatles)

Helped immensely by the "Back in the U.S.- Back in the U.S.-" stutter part, which I still haven't figured out.

63. Fixing a Hole (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

My first instinct is to say I've underrated this song a great deal, but I just scanned the ones above it and no, there really are 62 songs arguably even better than this one. This song seems like Paul is fighting the demons that made some of his songs a little hokey and old-timey; do the opening notes and the "Really doesn't matter if I'm wrong I'm right" parts much match the verse and the "Silly people" parts? What would I think of this song if it were all like the latter and not like the former?

62. It Won't Be Long (With the Beatles)

Could this be the most underrated of all Beatle songs ever (by others, not by me)? Does anyone even have this album who doesn't have all the Beatle albums? Is this song the best album opener of all time? What would I give to sound like John does here? How much worse would my mood be today if they hadn't started selling Cadbury Creme Eggs by now? These are all good questions. Rare personal note: Played this last night with the 3-year-old, and watching him try to time Paul and George's "Yeah!"s is just the right amount of fun to have at your kid's expense. Any more would be inhumane, like that redneck who filmed his kid freaking out from the anesthetic at the dentist.

* * *

Join us tomorrow, when we examine whether Golden Slumbers/Carry That Weight/The End should be broken up or not -- or even if they can. Watch with delight as I come up with two different answers! It will astound and amaze you.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: number nine ... number nine ...

Obvious to you, perhaps, but I just thought of it after writing the last post.

90. Old Brown Shoe (Past Masters vol. II)

A throwaway for many, I'm sure, maybe even for George, but always a minor favorite of mine. Underrated solo, too.

89. Day Tripper (Past Masters vol. II)

This song is more than its riff. The song structure is admittedly a little weak, but the vocal performance is terrific.

88. Lady Madonna (Past Masters vol. II)

We could almost knock off this whole disc here, no? Anyway, I'm trying not to do this, as I think I mentioned, but I probably rated this a little higher than I would have were I taking only the final cut into account. I can't help it; I've heard some of the alternate versions and takes, and some of them, especially the one with the dynamite sax solo, make me look upon this song a little more kindly. There's another one of these coming.

87. The Word (Rubber Soul)

I'm not sure; this is either the first song where I thought How can this be only No. 87?!? or the first song I reevaluated strongly due to this exercise and came to a radically different conclusion. Which is to say, I always enjoy this song a lot, but I had to admit it wasn't as good as a lot of other songs.

86. Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

You bounder! You cheat! What can I say? As with some other songs, I concede its greatness (and rarely skip it) but don't love it. I also might have issues with either the mixing or the choices they made for some of the guitar/organ sounds. Points for what John does with his voice in the bridge.

85. Yellow Submarine (Revolver)

Not much point talking about this song. I'll say only that it's this high thanks to the great chorus harmonies. Was listening to it this weekend, and there were times I thought Ringo and the others were switching back and forth as to who was singing the melody and who the harmonies.

84. Yes It Is (Past Masters vol. I)

If it was a surprise to rank The Word so low, this one actually hurts. I love this song. The bridge is so awesome in so many ways. And I like the guide vocal version on the Anthology CD single, where John goes silly.

83. Penny Lane (Magical Mystery Tour)

Flawless execution, and a great song, and I do like it; I just never reach for it. Very nice vocal that's fun to sing, though.

82. Money (With the Beatles)

John's vocal is so charismatic and propulsive that it actually plays tricks on my mind; when I play this, I expect it to be more raw and hardcore instrumentally, because that's how I remember it. Good harmonies too.

81. Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da (The Beatles)

Lady Madonna's half-sister. There's an alternate take with a really full-bodied acoustic guitar featuring prominently, and either that take or another has more sax in it than the album cut, and I can't really discount that no matter how I try.

80. Two of Us (Let It Be)

Why? I don't know. And I don't care if it's really about Yoko or Linda or whoever it's supposed to be out. In my mind, this song represents something, and no matter how simple, it's well done.

79. She Loves You (Past Masters vol. I)

I am certainly giving this one greatness/breakthrough points; I listen to the songs we've already covered today far more frequently. But I listened to it a lot once -- too much, I guess -- and haven't soured on it, just tired of it.

78. It's All Too Much (Yellow Submarine)

It is too much, or at least a little too long, and I'm not sure how coherent it is, but it's always held a soft spot in my heart -- the harmonies, the weird drum sound, the psychedelic electric guitar sound, the harmony, the horns ... I read on a bootleg site yesterday that there's actually an eight-minute version.

77. Martha My Dear (The Beatles)

I like this a lot. He meant this. I don't know what he meant for sure, but he definitely meant it more than some of the more widely known stuff. Maybe the similarly styled songs of his that I don't like were just him going to the well one time too many.

76. Rocky Raccoon (The Beatles)

Another song that was fun when you first heard it and you never forgot it. This song is unique in some ways.

* * *

So there; we've crossed into the material that I love. Some of my favorites coming up tomorrow, although I imagine I'll be writing that every day from here on in.

Little advice

I've never experienced writer's block, but if any of our readers have, here's a sure cure: Take some melatonin. You'll be writing all kinds of weird stuff in no time.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: IIX

One time, at the start of a gig, a friend of the singer's either felt compelled or was conscripted to introduce us. I don't remember all of his introduction -- it was funny, but lengthy, and I eventually cut him off, concerned no one had told him we had limited time for the set -- but I'll never forget the beginning: "These guys ... these guys are not my favorite band ..." It was funny, and it was said with love.

That's kind of how I feel when I look at today's set. These songs ... these songs are not my favorite songs ... but they're so much fun. Again I'm struck by how your 100th-favorite song by a band can be so much fun.

106. When I'm Sixty-Four (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

This song ... OK, enough of that. But my fondness for this song comes 75 percent from whatever they did to John's voice, and how the harmony of that line works. (George again gets a nice part.) The other quarter comes from how much my kid enjoys when it comes up during the Yellow Submarine film, but I promised myself I wouldn't overdo the personal-life shtick.

105. Good Morning Good Morning (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

It seems preposterous, but with the exception of John's voice when he's singing balls-out, I am unable to think of a Beatle 'sound' I enjoy more than the crunchy saxes. I know he wasn't fond of this song, but he was missing out. Damn lyrics aren't everything.

104. She's a Woman (Past Masters vol. I)

I'm not entirely sure what Paul's trying to do with his voical here; it never struck me when I listened to this song all the time 12 years ago, but it's kind of strange, isn't it? He must have been imitating someone.

103. We Can Work It Out (Past Masters vol. II)

This kind of marked the end of the transition from the early period to the middle period for me. I mean, first of all, it backed Day Tripper (in the UK; in the U.S., it was the A-side). Second, it was released in between Rubber Soul and Revolver. The only Rubber Soul single released in the U.S. after We Can Work It Out was Nowhere Man. And the next single was Paperback Writer/Rain, so clearly they were firmly into the middle by then. Not my favorite track, this, but it does mark the end of the early period, where the music sometimes had this infectious upbeat energy that I think it rarely if ever had again.

102. Ballad of John and Yoko (Past Masters vol. II)

I really have no idea why I like this song as much as I do. The part where John sings "Think!" is pretty awesome, though.

101. Baby It's You (Please Please Me)

John's vocal is meant to be tender but just sounds earnestly -- and endearingly -- goofy. Nice moment right at the end of the verse where they go all-out vocally. Doesn't have much to do with the Beatles, but Smith did a fascinating thing where they recreated that effect, but with the whole ensemble, not just the vocals. If anyone knows how I can get my hands on that track without buying the whole disc, hit me up.

100. I Want to Hold Your Hand (Past Masters vol. I)

More fun, and a big breakthrough, of course, but this song hasn't been the same for me since high school, when a band I was in would play "Just What I Needed" by the Cars and it turned out to have the same progression in the verse. That wasn't the problem, though; the problem was that our singer, who otherwise did a fine job, sounded like Henry Kissinger when he sang that song. (No bet on what I sounded like playing guitar.) So now that Bminor-y chord that's the fourth and eighth lines of the verse (in I Want to Hold Your Hand) saps some of the appeal of the song. Probably you had to be there. If my 100th-favorite song wasn't going to be one I loved, I'm glad it could be one so iconic. Because, you know, the Beatles still desperately need me to make their case for them.

99. Blue Jay Way (Magical Mystery Tour)

I might have overrated this; I'm into it right now.

98. Magical Mystery Tour (Magical Mystery Tour)

The album is uneven as anything, and we won't even talk about the film, but the song goes to some nice places. Has it been established who's singing the first verse? Sounds like Ringo and John together to me.

97. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (Reprise) (Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)

I really like Paul's vocal here; it makes this song much more interesting than it deserves to be. The thought and effort are apparent.

96. Helter Skelter (The Beatles)

This song moved around the rankings some before settling here. Doesn't benefit from repeated listens, but you have to respect the things that gave it such impact the first time you heard it. I didn't like Paul's late screamers much, or his screaming on the later songs, but he's great here. And the riff in the chorus is aces, the guitar sound prefiguring AC/DC by seven years.

95. I'm Down (Past Masters vol. I)

I normally don't go in for 12-bar blues unless Hendrix is involved, but a fun track. There's something about the lead vocal that's not perfect, and it's cute. And John's playing the organ with his elbow ... what evokes the fun period better?

94. Blackbird (The Beatles)

I mean, sure, I like the song. But can we all admit that this wasn't his best vocal performance?

93. Glass Onion (The Beatles)

Great use of strings. My take, unless I stole it from the original countdown guy: John was trying to talk people into taking his lyrics less seriously. I love "Listen to me." Oops; I just checked, and I did steal that from the first countdown guy, although he researched his piece, so he might have gotten it from someone else. Kind of like the Beatles!

92. Bad Boy (Past Masters vol. I)

Discovered this late, and never lost the sense memory of hearing for the first time this or any other song where John sings like this.

* * *

Tomorrow's set should see some genuine affection creeping in, after we dispense with a couple more songs that many others love but I just like.

Why did no one tell me about this?

I totally would have put one of these in my yard.

Ranking the Beatles my damn self: se7en

We got Eleanor Rigby out of the way, so you must have some idea of what's coming today. I won't make you wait long for it.

120. I Will (The Beatles)

This song, Blackbird, Rocky Raccoon (well, half of it), Mother Nature's Son, Honey Pie ... am I wrong, or is the McCartney stuff from the White Album more "solo" than anyone else's? The rest of the band were clearly necessary for Dear Prudence, Happiness is a Warm Gun, Savoy Truffle, Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey ... but a lot of Paul's stuff sounds like demos. Weird, as he gets the rep for trying hardest to keep the band together.

By the way, I love Paul McCartney. That maybe wasn't clear.

119. Yesterday (Help!)

And there it is. Why? I don't know. Just not fun to sing, listen to, think about ... maybe I'm just not very deep. A musical hedonist.

118. The Night Before (Help!)

Nice vocals by everyone on this. As with other songs from this album and A Hard Day's Night, maybe not the strongest track, but benefits from the material around it, instead of getting shown up by it.

117. I'll Be Back (A Hard Day's Night)

Major/minor/major/minor. And it works! This in some ways typifies how I think of the early Beatles. John was clearly the lead singer, and Paul did harmonies when they thought he should. I know he sang plenty, and they sang plenty together, but look at this album, for example. How many of the songs did John sing? He dominated all or parts of 9 of the 13 songs.

116. Tell Me Why (A Hard Day's Night)

The first of the really great songs on this album. The music isn't much, but the vocals from everyone are just superb. I really think Matthew Sweet must have listened to this and to With the Beatles a lot.

115. It's Only Love (Help!)

So John later said he didn't like this song very much. And it's maybe a bit corny. But there's something genuine in the chorus. And I would listen just for the way he sings the words "to make it up girl".

Speaking of John saying he didn't much like this song: I was watching A Hard Day's Night yesterday, and I figured out why it bugs me. It occurred to me during the film-ending 'concert' medley. More specifically, during the 'performance' of I Should Have Known Better. If you watch John singing it, his smile seems forced. And maybe this isn't fair; I could be wrong, and there could be other reasons for the smile seeming forced -- oh, I don't know, the idea of spending a day lip-syncing comes to mind. But when he poo-poos the material, you start wondering Did he like any of it? Certainly the simpler, earlier songs? Was he just being mercenary about it, not writing what he liked but what he thought would sell? It brings out the cynic in me.

114. Love Me Do (Please Please Me)

Great song? No. But as a first song? Sweet. George Martin didn't like it, not as a single, and the Beatles rarely mined this Everly vein again, but it's the perfect opener for them; one of the other strong songs from this record might have raised the bar too high, and shown up some of the filler.

113. Can't Buy Me Love (A Hard Day's Night)

Just blues, man. Great vocal performance by Paul. George Martin was big into starting hits with the chorus.

112. Long Tall Sally (Past Masters vol. I)

Christ but Paul could sing, no? And he made it seem so effortless.

111. Don't Let Me Down (Past Masters vol. II)

Lots of writers refer to three-chord songs. They usually mean the verse has only three chords, or the chorus does. This song has three chords.

I tend not to favor John's simpler later compositions. He was moving in a more direct direction, and I respect that. But I think he did himself a disservice in interviews in later years, acting like It's Only Love wasn't any good, and Run for Your Life was filler, and why were they always messing in the studio with his songs, like Strawberry Fields Forever and Tomorrow Never Knows? Yeah, 'cause I'm sure the first time he heard Tomorrow Never Knows, he thought it was 'alright.' He was blown away by it! *Everyone* was blown away the first time they heard that song. Not to mention, John wanted it even weirder. Oh, OK, I guess John didn't show up in the studio saying he'd accidentally played Rain backwards as he was passing out the night before, and could they do that on the cut. Probably he wanted to do I Am the Walrus with only a single kazoo for accompaniment.

110. Rock and Roll Music (For Sale)

Follows No Reply, I'm a Loser, and Baby's in Black. I mean, can you imagine if they weren't cutting two albums plus however many singles a year back then, if they could have done all originals? The originals on this album are unreal. Fortunately, he had that voice, so even if he was singing someone else's song, he made it sound like this.

109. I'll Get You (Past Masters vol. I)

Might have rated this this highly solely for what little harmony is in this song -- the "I've imagined I'm in love with you" line and the bridge. Mostly that one line. People who ignore the early stuff are missing out.

108. Love You To (Revolver)

I'm bad, skipping around on this album, but I should listen to this more. The harmony is awesome, and I can't hear him sing "I'll make love to you" without laughing; he sounds so much like the master of all he surveys.

107. One After 909 (Let It Be)

Nice swing. I might not be able to explain why I like this song this much. It might actually benefit from being on a weaker album.

106. I've Got a Feeling (Let It Be)

More for John's part, and the part where each sings his part at the same time, than for Paul's part.

* * *

We've kind of knocked off the middle-grade stuff from Please Please Me, With the Beatles, A Hard Day's Night, For Sale, Help!, Revolver, the White Album, Yellow Submarine, Abbey Road, and Let It Be. You can be sure that tomorrow we'll be doing the same for the Past Masters discs, Magical Mystery Tour, and Sgt. Pepper.

Super Bowl 'thought'

I would like to see the great Springsteen.